…The Scary Days!
by joebthegreat
Summary: Everyone is trapped in the mansion! OMFG! someone or something seems to be killing everyone! and the Smashers are too stupid to do anything about it. Rated T cause someone died! OMFG! DEATH! name is like a story i cant remind you of... oh well... FIN!
1. Trapped!

**The Scary Days!**

**Chapter 1! Trapped! **(the most overly used chapter name I can think of)

Disclaimer: I don't own the facts… or SSBM… or Nintendo… or a mansion…

Reviews:

**BLADJGJAKDKG**: THANKS! I'll remember that next time I care!

GOLD STARS:

**BLADJGJAKDKG**: 1 for reviewing me and making me feel happy

Joeb: 999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999

Ok this was given to me in a brainstorm on some way to make Knuckles Spyro Fox Zelda ohhhh whatever I don't know that name good enough to say it without looking… happier! why you ask? Because I'm on her favorite authors list!

So first I decided I needed another humor fic! Then I decided a horror/humor would be nice cause I've seen lots of horrors but few things mocking a horror… and I'm sorry to offend… NOT… but I didn't exactly like most the horror/humor fics… OR I just thought it wasn't a humor… whatever… so ANYWAY I decided that this would be cool to do so hey!

Oh I know she'd like it if I read and reviewed her story but sadly I don't read Zelda stuff… due to unmoral morals … oh well

* * *

So there they were… the Smashers were sitting in the mansion doing random stupid stuff, it was around 5:50 in the morning and most weren't awake. 

Peach woke up early and made something quick to eat in the kitchen.

DK was also in the kitchen and realized they were out of Bananas so he was going to the store in the SSB SUV.

Link was on the couch in the living room doing back flips when he slammed into a bookcase and caused it to fall on top of him as he screamed.

Mewtwo came rushing to aid and fixed up the bookcase while yelling at Link about the importance of books in society.

Roy and Marth were sparring in the main hall but were stupid enough to use their real swords and Roy cut Marth's finger off.

"AHHH THE PAIN! THE TORTURE! THE EXCRUCIATING ANGONY!" Marth cried and then Roy cut through his neck and Marth fell to the floor, dead.

"Oh crud now what am I gonna do…" Roy thought and then decided to drag Marths body up to his room before everyone was awake to notice.

"He just barely made it when a crash came from the front of the mansion waking everyone up.

Mario and Luigi came running to see what had happened when they noticed DK flying out of the SSB SUV at them.

"AHHHHH!" Mario screamed staying where he was.

Luigi walked out of the way.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" Mario screamed some more waiting for the rolling hairy ape to reach him.

CRASH!

DK ran into Mario and they fell over when DK got up and looked embarrassed, he had just managed to crash the SUV into the front door in such a strange way that no one could get in or out.

So then Bowser who likes to sleep outside had to use the back door… witch was considerably smaller, as he walked in a cracking noise was heard and he couldn't move.

"ARG! THIS SUCKS!" Bowser screamed trying to move.

Y. Link, Popo, Nana, Ness, and Roy all came down together and noticed Bowser and started rolling on the floor laughing, which isn't a very good when theirs so much stuff in the mansion… Ness's big head slammed into a table and the vase on it smashed into his head.

"OWWW!" he cried and started rubbing his head, but then Y. Link who hit his head into a corner, was running around and tripped on Ness's head.

Everyone Piled up at the bottom of the stairs.

"HAHAHA YOU MORONIC KIDS!" Bowser laughed as everyone just ignored him from then on.

Zelda and Gannondorf were watching the 6:00 am news after being aroused (you know what I mean you perv), the news was showing 300,000 anime freaks standing on a cliff planning for a mass suicide unless the TV networks would put on more anime programs.

Now just so you know the SSBM mansion sits right by a cliff. And isn't the biggest of mansions.

Everyone started gathering around the TV to place bets on whether or not they would jump, Mr. G&W was betting with Pichu.

"BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP" Pichu just sat there with a confused look on his face.

Just then Mr. G&W slipped through a crack in the floor and died.

Zelda, Mario, Dr. Mario, Pikachu, and Y. Link all bet on them not jumping.

Gannondorf, Luigi, Mewtwo, Jigglypuff, and Roy all bet on them jumping.

The anime freaks got sick of waiting to allow all the people at home to place bets so they just shrugged and jumped off the cliff.

"NOOOO!" Zelda shrieked.

The people who had bet on them jumping started dancing around happily, not caring that 300,000 people died, just happy they got their money.

Just then a thump came from the roof and the TV went out, Yoshi ran to a window to see what was happening.

"ITS RAINING PEOPLE!" Yoshi cried.

"OH NO!" Roy screamed and started looking around nervously "I'D BETTER CHECK ON MARTH HE HASN'T COME OUT ALL DAY!"

So everyone started running around in circles which is not the smartest thing to be doing with about 21 other people in a crowded living room with lots of crap. They started running into stuff and falling on the floor. Now there was 21 people squirming on the floor screaming.

"OW WHATS GOING ON!" Bowser screamed "I CAN'T FEEL MY LEGS!"

Samus then shot a bullet into the air to shut everyone up. "OK SHUTUP! WE JUST NEED TO STAY CALM AND…" but the shot loosened a light fixture and it landed on her knocking her out.

"AHHHHHH!" everyone started screaming and running around in circles again.

"WHATS HAPPENING!" Ness cried out.

Everyone stopped and Mewtwo put on a graduate hat, "I believe that a great someone with great power has trapped us inside for his evil purposes!"

Everyone agreed with that over the mass suicide people having jumped onto their mansion.

Just then Roy came down with a fake look of shock on his face, "Someone murdered Marth, there must be a murderer amongst us!"

After hearing this everyone started running in circles again, fell over again, and squirmed on the floor screaming.

"GUYS! I'M IN A LOT OF PAIN HERE! CAN I GET SOME FOOD OR SOMETHING! GUYS!" Bowser's screams came from the back room, but everyone ignored him.

* * *

YAY! 

I like this… I know no one will read due to everyone having done one of these… and they all say TRAPPED! For the first chapter, and there is always a quick death, and there is always some force stopping them from getting out of some form of a mansion.

Death list! (ok guys I'll just list the ones who died…) meanie:

Marth: Died by sparring with real swords

Mr. G&W: Died by falling through a crack in the ground

Ohm… 15 gold stars to anyone who tells me what the crud that word means…

Ohhhhhhh and review me too, PLEASE! I know its unoriginal that's why its your job to review me and make me feel a bit happier… as long as I get one review for the WHOLE story I'm going to make this… even if it's a flam… and I'm willing to review myself.


	2. Not Trapped Anymore!

**The Scary Days!**

**Chapter 2! Not Trapped anymore!**

Disclaimer: I will soon own tikitikirevenge but you don't wanna know about that, I don't own Green Day, I don't own how mad everyone gets when I say something SO OFFENSEVE!

Reviews: well it appears this story was very controversial in the fact that it has humor… I'm so sorry

**Speciall Ed**: YAY! I'm making the entire story for you now… screw Knucles Spyro Fox Link Zidane Sora

**Tealfrog26**: YAY! Well I'm glad to know what crud means now… and update your stories!

**Me Myself and 1**: you have no account so BLEH!

**Joeb**: BLEH!

**tikitikirevenge**: oh that's sad… you were wrong… And I will never doubt your stories are original… but hey us crazy people need to be allowed to do stuff too

**Psie**: YAY! Out of 8 reviews 3 liked 2 hated 1 I have no clue and 2 were my own… that's not very good is it… oh well you enjoyed so YAY!

2 more wouldnt show up after i did this but thanks for the review/flam/kdfhjsrakfasdfa

GOLD STARS:

Everyone can have 10 and Tealfrog gets 15 cause he asked for it… yes even you flamers… cept for the bigot cause I don't like bigots.

Ok so ANYWAY this story forced me to try PCP… (that's not true so please don't be offended! PLEASE!)

OMFG is fun to say so hey

LMAO isn't

* * *

So now that they were all stuck in the house they started going hysterical. 

DK was lying on the floor sucking his thumb begging for bananas.

Roy was sparring with Link in the basement, but they were idiots and used their real swords. Roy sliced Link in half.

"OHH! NOOO!" Link screamed and then died.

"GOD DAMNIT!" Roy yelled and tried to hide the half bodies somewhere in the basement where it would be found soon.

Then Roy went up to watch the TV which had somehow started working again.

Green Day was singing in front of a crowd of thousands.

"I WALK ALONE!"

Thousands of people screamed and jumped up and down. (if you don't get that then bleh)

"Where's Link, Roy" Zelda asked

"Oh he said he had something to do downstairs… no clue what"

So Zelda went to check on Link.

Mario and Luigi were doing back flips when Luigi accidentally kicked Mario in the chin causing him to go flying out the window.

"OWW!" Mario screamed and then realized where he was "WE'RE FREE!"

Then Bowser managed to slide out of the back door

"oh that feels GOOD! I need some food now"

But as Bowser was heading for the fridge everyone heard a scream come from the… UPSTAIRS!

Everyone went upstairs to see Gannondorf in his room shrieking pointing at a mouse.

When they saw the mouse everyone screamed and started running around in circles.

"SHUT UP!" Samus yelled firing a shot up to silence everyone.

"NOW WHAT WE NEED…" but the shot damaged a light fixture and it landed on her knocking her out.

"Woa De ja voo!" C. Falcon said

"WHERE THE CRUD HAVE YOU BEEN ALL DAY!" Yoshi asked.

"Umm I was doing back flips in my room?"

"PICHU!" Pichu screamed when Roy walked over and stepped on him causing him to crinkle up and die.

"WHAT THE F&#" He screamed and then realized something "oh wait no one cares about Pichu!"

Everyone shrugged and got back to the business at hand. The mouse had crawled onto the bed.

"ARG!" Fox screamed and shot the mouse.

"Ok now that that's done…" they said and went back to doing nothingness.

Just then a scream came from the basement. Zelda came running up crying.

"I JUST SAW LINK! MAKING OUT WITH MALON!"

"Wait what the hell?" Roy said as he walked down to the basement seeing a sliced in half Link.

"HAHA GOTCHA! HES JUST DEAD!"

"Okay then…" Roy started walking away.

"Its not that bad… I like Marth more anyway!"

"Umm Zelda"

"Yes!"

"Marth died earlier today"

"NOOOOO!"

So everyone went into the main hall to discuss the events.

"Can we just ignore this? I really want to eat something now" Bowser said holing his stomach feeling woozy.

"NOW" Peach said assuming the roll of leader, "FOUR DEATHS! WE DON'T KNOW WHO KILLED MARTH LINK MR. G&W OR PICHU!"

"Ummm sure that works" Roy looked around nervously.

"THE NEXT THING WE NEED TO DO IS ALL GO TO SLEEP!"

"What?" Mewtwo cried out, "why do we always want to go to sleep!"

"BECAUSE WE WANT TO! NOW ME AND MARIO WILL FORCE YOU ALL TO YOUR ROOMS AND LOCK THEM FROM THE OUTSIDE SO YOU CANT ESCAPE!"

"Umm we can just leave and call the cops… since we aren't trapped anymore…" Mewtwo said.

"WHAT!" everyone screamed… but then just agreed to sleep and started to go to their rooms.

Bowser who needs to eat his body weight every meal started feeling woozy cause he missed a meal… then fainted.

"THAT'S THE SPIRIT!" Peach yelled and everyone else went to their rooms to go to bed.

Then went to sleep.

Then woke up feeling refreshed… it was now 12:00 pm.

"Now what do we do… its still the middle of the day!"

So they decided to stay in the house and watch TV!

They were watching TV when Luigi saw Bowser on the floor, DEAD!

"AHHH! FREE FOOD!"

And everyone ran in and ripped the dead Bowser to pieces and started cooking him.

Then they watched the TV.

"OH MATTHEW! I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU!" some chick named Fred cried.

"I WOULD LOVE YOU FRED… BUT" as Matthew turned his head away dramatically "YOUR NAME IS JUST SO GAY!"

"OHH WHY!" Fred cried and fell over… then didn't get up… Matthew checked her pulse and she was dead.

"NOOO! WHY!" he screamed and held his fist into the air.

Everyone watching started crying and blowing their nose on Gannondorfs cape… so he screamed and threw it away… who needs a cape anyways.

So Samus changed the channel to MTV.

Just then a light fixture somehow fell and hit only her knocking her out.

"WE'RE HERE AT STD, FLORIDA! AND WE'RE PARTYING!

"Woo" and unenthusiastic crowed cheered

"YA THAT'S RIGHT! AND WE'RE TALKING TO CELEBRITY MARED DJENIHOE!"

The crowed looked around confused and just gave a little cheer.

"NOW MARED! I HEAR YOU HAVE A TATOO OF AN EQUAL SIGN ON YOUR LEFT BUT CHEEK! WHAT DOES THAT MEAN!"

"Well you see, Bob…" before he could continue C. Falcon switched the channel to Cartoon Network.

"OH MAYOR!" Bubbles cried as a disturbing scene came on the TV and they turned the channel again.

They were on the Chanting channel as everyone agreed 5 hours of chanting would be perfectly fine.

Just then Peach walked out of the room and walked back in again.

"THERES BEEN ANOTHER MURDER!"

"THIS CAN MEAN ONLY ONE THING!" Mewtwo stated "THERE IS A MURDERER IN THE HOUSE!"

Everyone just looked at him weirdly… it was now 2:00 pm

and DK then realized he hadn't had a banana all day.

"ARG!"

* * *

YAY! 

ADD!

I'm hoping for at least one more flam by next update!

DEATH LIST:

MARTH!

MR. G&W!

LINK!

PICHU!

R&S READ AND SPLATTER!


	3. The Investigation!

**The Scary Days!**

**Chapter 3! The Investigation**

Disclaimer: I do not own the stuff I make fun of here… I do own a computer and I will buy a life soon.

Read 'Here Today, Gone Tomorrow' cause it's a good horror/mystery… and I make fun of some stuff they say.

REVIEWS: my whole life is getting some peeps to like me and offending the rest, so this is good!

**razzkat**: Ummm what happened last night… I'm having a hango… ummm a confused state of mind… ohh but I'll give you a gold star if you slap Speciall Ed

**Speciall Ed**: well thanks and ummm thanks again and read this and I just woke up so I'm tired but thanks and um I'll give you a gold star if you slap razzkat

GOLD STARS:

**razzkat**: you can have 3 cause you were reviewing me TONS last night… or was that mourning or two days ago… WHAT! You confused me so only 2 gold stars

**Speciall Ed**: you can have 1 gold star cause Ed is Special not Speciall and I pity you for not knowing.

**Joeb**: for yelling at my flammers and cause you have my name and live in my house you can have 235

REEL BIG FISH! (sorry I should keep that to the ad fic… oh well)

Ohh and read my arse… I got a tattoo there but its not exactly something I'm proud of

* * *

"Who the hell could be murdered when everyone has been right here the whole time?" Roy asked annoyed with his companions. 

"It was…. BOWSER!" Peach shrieked and fainted.

" OH NO!" everyone cried in unison then looked around at each other.

"THAT WAS WEIRD" they all said.

"SHUT UP!" they all said once again perfectly together.

"ARG! BLEH! WHODOVOODOO! WIGGLEWE!" They just gave up and sat listening again.

But Peach had fainted so the person they were listening to was silent.

Samus walked in front of everyone and shot her blast up to get their attention.

"OK NOW WE NEED TO INVESTIGATE! I…" then a light fixture landed on her.

"How many of those are IN this house?" C. Falcon asked.

"exactly 13" Mewtwo answered.

DK was still rolling on the floor when a banana slapped into his head and a delivery man who had come through the back door started giving everyone their orders.

Mewtwo got a supercomputer.

Ness got a bomb.

Gannondorf got a voodoo doll.

Mario got the NEW HARRY POTTER BOOK!

DK got tons of bananas.

Then they got the 3 tons of food they usually needed daily.

"AND I'M OFF!" The delivery man yelled and tried doing a backflip out the window but just slapped into the wall and fell down Knocked out.

"OK!" Mario screamed.

"WE WILL START AN INVESTIGATION! I WILL READ THIS BOOK AS SAMUS, FOX, NESS, MEWTWO, AND YOSHI INVESTIGATE!"

"Why me?" Yoshi asked.

"Cause we always need a fifth man!" Mario answered.

"Why Samus… she's knocked out!"

"Cause she's a bounty hunter!"

Then C. Falcon ran up, flexing muscles we didn't even know existed.

"IM A BOUNTY HUNTER!"

"Now now now" Mario said shaking his head "We need to always have one guy who doesn't know what he's doing!"

"OH FINE!"

So Fox, Ness, Mewtwo, and Yoshi dragged a knocked out Samus up to the first murder… MARTH!

"Oh and Dr. Mario you do an autopsy on the victims in your lab in the third floor"

"OK!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!" Dr. Mario screamed and ran up to his lab.

"Hmm" Samus said coming to, "It looks like he was hit in the neck with a sword…"

"ohh yes… and it looks like he was fighting back cause his sword is unsheathed" Fox said.

"Ah and from the missing thumb we know that there was ummm stuff" Yoshi said.

"Well the person knew how to fight… with swords…. Ok then" Mewtwo said.

They took the body up to Dr. Mario's lab.

"Hmmm ah yes it looks like he was hit with a sword… yes that is the diagnoses" Dr. Mario said after just putting Marth on a table and covering him with a blanket then putting him in a freezer.

"OK!" they all said overly happy.

"No need to check the other bodies we'll just throw them in the garbage dispenser" Samus said and shot her gun up in triumph.

CRASH!

Samus was knocked out by a falling light fixture.

(WITH MARIO!)

"Hmm ah yes the Prime minister knew about wizards all along! HA Fudge is fired… ahh yes" Mario said reading the Harry Potter book, "OHH DUMBLEDOOR WAS ACTUALLY A RAPIST! that's interesting… oh Harry Potter and Herminoe… eww!"

Just then the detective people walked into the room… Samus riding on Yoshi's back.

"HE WAS HIT WITH A SWORD!"

"It's as we suspected… Roy did it cause he found the body!" Mario said.

Everyone all went to the room with the TV… THE LIVING ROOM!

"OK!" Mario started off impressing everyone with a back flip which ended up in him landing on his neck and getting knocked out.

"IT WAS ROY!" The detective peeps yelled pointing at Roy.

Roy looked scared and yelled back.

"YOU HAVE NO PROOF!"

"YOU SAW THE BODY FIRST!"

"IT WAS Y. LINK!" Roy yelled back "HE HAD THE MOTIVE! ALWAYS THOUGHT OF AS THE LITTLE ONE!"

Just then The Real World came on MTV and they ignored this argument to watch TV.

Some weirdoes were at a hot-dog stand selling stuff when one of them screamed crazily.

Then they were at home when another one screamed crazily.

Then as they went to bed when some bouncing was heard from one of the rooms and a girl screamed crazily.

Then the next morning everyone walked out of their rooms and screamed crazily.

"YEA RIGHT!" Mewtwo yelled, "real life isn't like that!"

"Just then Peach screamed crazily"

"Ok never mind" Mewtwo said.

Then everyone got to doing nothingness…

Roy and Y. Link were Sparring in the hallway on the second floor but were stupid enough to use real swords when Roy sliced Y. Links legs off and one of his arms.

"OH MY GOD I'M SICK OF THIS!" Roy screamed and hid the body in Y. Links room.

C. Falcon was in the kitchen when he saw something named 'anti-freeze'. Wondering what that was he decided to take a drink… shrugged and started to leave when he collapsed.

They noticed both deaths due to Mewtwo being psychic.

"OK WELL IM JUST GOING TO TAKE A SHOWER NOW!" Peach said and went to take a shower.

"Don't worry guys, I've called the great detective Richard Moore!" Zelda cried with a cell phone in her hand.

"YAY!" Everyone cried in unison.

"OH CRAP WE DID IT AGAIN!"

ARG!"

Just then the delevery man woke up and tried to run out the back door, but missed and slapped into the wall getting knocked out again.

* * *

DUN DUN DUN! 

Well it looks like Case Closed is coming to the SSBM Mansion!

I wonder what will happen…

DEATH LIST!

Marth

Mr. Flat freak that always falls through a crack

Link

Pichu

Bowser

Y. Link

C. Falcon

R&PCP READ AND PERCIEVE CRAPPY PLOT!


	4. Case Jammed!

**The Scary Days!**

**Chapter 4! Case Jammed!**

Disclaimer: I do not own adult swim and I'm happy about that… meh not really I'd be making loads of cash so hey I wish I owned adult swim, oh and I do own half of a peanut, it was on sale at Ebay!

Reviews:

Meh whatever I'm updating so be happy…

GOLD STARS:

I can have 10 and you can have 1 tikitikirevenge and razzkat gets 1 and annalisavk can have the corpse of my dear friend… Donkey Bong

Oh this is more of a spoof of Case Closed with SSBM as the suspects… don't worry they wont find the murderer… I couldn't do that to you this early in the fic.

Understand I'm 14 and stupid, being stupid I stayed up for who knows how long and this is gonna be jacked up… maybe… maybe not… just slap me every once in a while.

Actually meh just read it… REEL BIG FISH!

* * *

A voice of a kid comes on the TV screen with all kinds of nobody cares stuff happening 

"Hello, my name is Conan Edigowa! Or it is now that I had poison slipped to me by some thugs!"

Just then it shows this wannabe Sherlock Holmes standing in the middle of all this mystical stuff as a band sings.

"IT WAS THE FIRST NEW CENTURY! IN ONE HUNDRED YEARS!"

Mewtwo just turned the TV off, it was 7:00 and he was sick of this crap.

"HA! EVERY NEW CENTURY IS IN 100 YEARS!" Mewtwo yelled.

Just then a knock came at the back door and Zelda went to answer it… she let in Richard Moore, some chick named Rachael, and a kid that looked like he wanted to be Sherlock Holmes.

"HELLO I'M HERE TO LOOK AT YOU!" Richard shouted and most everyone went to the back room.

Conan wandered around when he noticed a barbeque chip mixed in with all the original.

"OHH!" Conans eyes went wide and he felt woozy… we'll call it a blehb.

"What's wrong with him?" Roy asked.

"OH HE DOES THAT ALL THE TIME!" Rachael screamed heroically.

Just then Conan saw the delivery man laying there starting to wake up.

"OHH!" Conan did the blehb again and looked around when the delivery man got up.

"WELL IM OFF!" he screamed and jumped out a window that wasn't even there knocking him out.

Detective Moore questioned everyone and decided that Roy did it cause he saw the dead body.

Just then Conan did the blehb and decided he had to act fast… he shot the knockout potion stuff from his bow tie… but it was an overdose and he ended up killing him… then kicked a bomb-omb to hit someone in the face.

The bomb-omb blew up as Conan kicked it and he was incinerated.

Rachael looked at the horrid scene and did a blehb then ran off crying before she slammed into the front door as they all remembered the SSB SUV was still lodged there.

She had been knocked out cold so they all decided to send her to Dr. Mario who wrapped her in a cloth and placed her in a freezer causing her to die.

Peach had then come out of the Shower disappointed and decided to hold a SSB Meeting!

Everyone gathered into the great hall, which was about as big as any other room, then they started!

"WE HAVE SUFFERED LOSSES AND THE GREAT DETECTIVE MOORE COULDN'T STOP THE MURDERER!" Peach cried. "WE MUST USE THE WEAPONS OF LIGHT!"

As she said this everyone looked around with awe… except the Ice Climbers who suddenly popped up in the story.

"UMM! WE PAWNED THOSE! MADE $376!"

Everyone looked evilly at the two then decided that it didn't matter.

"OH WELL!" Peach screamed "I'LL BE TAKING A NAP IN MY UNLOCKED ROOM IF YOU CARE! IT IS NOW 9:00 SO I HOPE YOU ALL HAVE FUN!"

Everyone that wasn't dead or sleeping huddled around the TV but Mewtwo had had enough and decided to go get something to eat. As he went, however, Roy who had also escaped and was doing back flips messed up and stabbed Mewtwos little band of skin behind his neck, it started spraying and blood got everywhere covering the entire room until it was nothing but blood.

"SOMEONE SHOOT ME!" Roy cried and decided he might as well just go and take a shower.

Just then Ness walked in and screamed.

"MY FAVORITE BAT!" he cried. "MY FAVORITE BAT HAS BEEN STAINED WITH BLOOD! OH NO!"

Everyone rushed in and saw the scene then using their brilliant detective skills decided that Ness must have done it and threw Mewtwo's body into a sausage maker.

Peach had come down to see the scene.

"YOU WLL BE HELD UNDER TRIAL TOMORROW! UNTIL THEN YOU ARE FREE!"

Just then a thought appeared in Samus's head… _who made Peach the leader anyways_.

Samus shot her gun in the air triumphantly and then as she went to speak a light fixture landed on her.

"Oh well" Everyone shrugged and then went to watch TV.

"WAIT!"

"CRUD WE'RE DOING IT AGAIN!"

Everyone decided not to care and they went back to watching TV.

It was on MTV's top 20 rock countdown and had reached 4 when it showed… FINGERS IN OUR SOUP! They were singing their now popular song I love you not.

It sounded like a ton of screams and slams against a wall as a the drums, crappy voices singing, no clue where the Bass guitar had gone, and the main guitarist couldn't play worth jack… they even thought they heard a dog barking here or there.

When it was done the Speaker was obviously pretending to be happy.

"WELL! Great song by Fingers in our Soup! Next is the…"

Gannondorf switched the channel to Comedy Central where the Daily show started cracking crappy jokes and then invited a reincarnated form of Stalin to talk about something obviously no one else cared about.'

Then they decided to go to Cartoon Network where Scooby Doo had been following a trail of drugs VERY carefully before collapsing to the ground in a high.

Finally they decided that Digrassi was the best thing for them to watch.

It was about some kid who's dad beat him and then said school was important, the kid cried, he couldn't take it any more, so he jumped… into the pool naked and laughed Hysterically before the cops came and dragged him off as he screamed in the pain being naked and dragged at the same time gave.

It was 11:00 pm so they decided it was time to go to bed… they left for their rooms making sure not to lock them at all…

Then they realized no one had eaten so they all ran downstairs ate and ran back to bed… the day was complete… they just had to hope everything would be fine in the morning seeing as they refused to lock the doors.

* * *

YAY! 

Well the death of Conan was fun enough even though no one watches the show…

And me and my friend had a large discussion where the Fingers in our Soup idea came from… along with a GREAT new idea for a story… I'm working on It now…ish

DEATH LIST:

MARTH

MR. G&W

LINK

PICHU

BOWSER

Y. LINK

C. FALCON

MEWTWO

R&PTR READ AND PRETEND TO REVIEW!

Ohh thanks to peeps who made me think I might care some day…


	5. The Spirits of the Kazzjaf!

**The Scary Days!**

**Chapter 5! The Spirits of the Kazzjaf**

Disclaimer: I don't own crap… actually that's not true I DO own crap… oh well I don't own the word disclaimer… I don't own ANYTHING! Except the word Kazzjaf… I think…

Reviews: (that I care about)

HA DO YOU REALLY THINK I CARE ABOUT YOU!

GOLD STARS:

Oh Tealfrog26 I will give you 34 if you update Resident Nintendo…

The rest of you reviewers can have 1... But shall remain nameless throughout the ages of khanshacka!

Which will last for at least a whole day…

Ah I love parodying anything in sight… including horrors… my dad got pissed when he heard I made a humor/horror ANYTHING… he says its not funny and I'm falling to the devil… hahaha fuck you dad… BAD WORD! NEVER DO THAT AGAIN!

REEL BIG FISH!

* * *

The next day they woke up to Ness's screams… when Mario ran to see what was happening a three headed dog was sitting on Ness's screaming body…

"MAMA MIA!" Mario screamed and his mama ran in and killed the beast waiting until right after it killed Ness to finish it.

"Well I guess it wasn't Ness then was it…" Mario said as everyone else came out of their rooms to see what happened…

"Oh it can still be Ness!" Roy yelled looking around nervously, "If it was Ness then there wont be any more deaths!" He said vowing to make sure no one else died.

"Oh… ummm" Peach looked around sadly "Well the Killer might still be here… unless Ness knew he would get caught and killed himself first.

"THAT'S WHAT HAPPENED I KNOW IT!" Roy screamed waiving his sword in the air.

So they all agreed that's what happened and Peach just went to her room crying.

"LETS ALL HAVE A PARTY!" Samus screamed and shot a blast up in celebration when a light fixture landed on her.

The rest just shrugged and went down to watch TV.

DK turned the channel to G4TV and they watched VIDEO GAME VIXENS!

It was mostly guys cracking cheap jokes and running around when they voted on the BEST LOOKING OGRE GIRL!

Gannondorf ripped the remote out of DK's hands and turned it to ABC family… Who's Line is it Anyway was on a marathon as Wayne Brady danced around and made a bald joke at Collin… Collin pulled a gun and shot Wayne in the face as screams were heard… Collin then shot Drew Carry but his fat stopped the bullet before it hit anything vital.

"You're that fat?" Collin screamed.

They all sat there and started laughing their heads off.

Then Jigglypuff turned to Cartoon Network as Pokemon was on…

Ash and Misty were looking all over for their lost Pokemon when some weird moral popped up and everyone smiled… then anime sweat dropped… just then Team Rocket got a brilliant idea… they pulled out guns and mowed them all down and took their Pokemon… simple… then they shot all the police Pokemon that came at them… then they shot each other in all the fun.

Pikachu watched the event in horror… then laughed cause his evil captor was finally gone.

Mario slapped Jigglypuff and took the remote turning it to Nickalsomethingian… Rugrats, all grown up came on and Tommy sat there with a bong looking stoned.

Then since I don't want to say anyone took the remote from anyone anymore they all turned it to MTV and watched Bam start messing with his parents… he did a trick where he jumped off a balcony and his parents screamed… then ran over and he was hanging by a bungee rope.

"HAHAHA!"

Just then Phil took the rope and cut it causing Bam to fall to his death.

They changed it to Comedy Central and watched South Park… why should I tell you what happens on it… oh fine Kenny hung himself and everyone went crazy about back flips.

Dr. Mario went up to check on his scientific crap in the lab… when he went up their he saw Marth's ghost sitting there staring at nothingness looking dramatic.

"Umm what the crud are you doing?" Dr. Mario asked.

Marth shifted to a new dramatic pose flinging his hair around when he said… "Kazzjaf"

Then Marth started making weird ghostly noises and disappeared.

"Umm okay then…"

He went and told Peach and she called a meeting in the great hall.

"DR. MARIO HAS SEEN A GHOST!"

Everyone made mumbling noises and shifted around.

"THE LAB IS HAUNTED! BUT I THINK I WILL ATTEMPT TO SLEEP THERE TONIGHT!" Peach yelled.

Then Samus ran up and shot her blast into the air to get everyone's attention.

"LOOK WHAT WE NEE…" a light fixture landed on her.

"wait isn't that more light fixtures than humanly possible to fit into mini mansion!" Mario asked… but they had slipped into the twilight zone… and logic was no longer a factor.

Everything went black and white when a guy walked up.

"The ghosts of Kazzjaf… and what about the…" but then a light fixture landed on him.

The delivery man walked in to get an audience.

"AND IM OFF!" he screamed and accidentally poked his eye out with the mashed potatoes… which takes skill… then just disappeared into thin air cause I'm sick of him.

So Peach went upstairs with a sleeping bag even though it was only 12:00.

Everyone else went to watch TV.

Except Nana and Popo who were doing back flips… suddenly Popo cracked his head against Roy's sword as he walked in.

Nana looked at her dead partner and cried before exploding.

Roy realized what he had done and screamed running back into his room pretending to be on fan fiction dot net reading stories.

Then Yoshi walked into the room, saw the body, and screamed…

Everyone ran into the room and noticed the body… Mario stood in front of it all.

"OK EVERYONE! YOSHI, FOX, SAMUS, FALCO, AND LUIGI WILL INVESTIGATE!"

Then Peach decided to get back to the lab.

Mario started reading his Harry Potter book… "AH YES! EVERYONE SNOGGED THEIR FRIENDS AND THE SNOG OF THE DAY GOES TO YOU RON AND SNOG SNOG SNOG!"

Yoshi, Fox, Samus, Falco, and Luigi all sat in the kitchen staring at the blood splatters.

Everyone else watched TV.

Kirby then turned to Jigglypuff…

"This may be our last time together…" Kirby started crying… then he and Jigglypuff tried to hug but couldn't and Kirby ended up pulling a muscle.

It was now 1:00 pm

* * *

YAY!

Oh and I think it will end with the last 4 escaping but I wont tell you who they are!

Actually I stole that statement from a story I made fun of in here… Monsters, Mansions, and Death

Oh that's fun and all but now its time for the…

DEATH LIST:

MARTH

MR. G&W

LINK

PICHU

BOWSER

Y. LINK

C. FALCON

MEWTWO

NESS

ICE CLIMBERS

Read and Review… meh I really don't care… ok so I do but don't flam cause I'm sick of those… actually flams are fun to read and laugh at… so flam…

HUNGRY HUNGRY HIPPOS!


	6. The Third Floor!

**The Scary Days!**

**Chapter 6! The Third Floor!**

Disclaimer: I don't even own this chapter name… I stole it… I'm sorry… but this is just the perfect thing to parody at the moment… I DON'T OWN ANY OF THIS! Seriously I own less than you think I might…

Reviews: (that I care about)

I don't care… actually I do… thanks to you that like this… but I wont respond except by giving you all gold stars… you can have 10 apiece… oh and you get a warm fuzzy feeling inside…

GOLD STARS:

Well I already gave them away… how about a nice little bottle of sand… how's that…

Oh can I have some beer?… NO?… what's so bad about a 14 year old freak drinking beer?… oh…

Oh I feel so bad for having used a bad word last chapter… I'm sorry… NOT!… oh man why do peeps have to be so offended about things that don't even concern them… like when a white guy gets mad at two blacks calling each other niggas… which was on Comedy Central so I can't get in trouble… or can I? OH CRUD!

REEL BIG FISH! Are you sick of that… cause they still pwn… I REALLY need to shut up… but as long as there are ignorant peeps that think Green Day is the best they must hear the word… that Reel Big Fish pwns Green Day… oh well…

* * *

So everyone decided to have yet another stupid meeting… it was 2:00 pm and I wont tell you what happened in that hour you didn't see… so ha.

"OK EVERYONE! THERE HAVE BEEN LESS DEATHS ON THE THIRD FLOOR THAN ANYWHERE ELSE! SO LETS ESCAPE THE MANSION FROM THERE!" Mario yelled.

Just then Yoshi who was outside eating random people came inside via the back door.

"What's going on here?" He asked

"Oh we plan on escaping this deadly mansion using a trap door on the third floor" Pikachu said.

"OK IM IN! IM SICK OF BEING STUCK HERE!"

Before they could leave Peach insisted on a nap time… in the basement… with all the lights out…

So they took an hour long nap…

Then they woke up…

Then they forgot what they were doing and went back to watching TV… except Roy and DK who were playing ping pong. The problem was that Roy was playing ping pong with his sword…

"TAKE THIS!" Roy screamed and swung his sword really hard loosing his grip and launching it into DK's eye.

"OK THAT IS IT!" Roy stepped back and started taking deep breaths… "I will not go near anyone alone again…"

Just then a female vampire came out of some random coffin.

"I WILL SUCK YOUR BLOOD!" she screamed.

He started to run when she trapped him.

"OH! But I cant… I have fallen in love with you my dear Roy… I will live off of donated blood from now on… ah my dear Roy… I love you… so very much…"

Just then 10 more vampires broke through the window well and pointed at the chick.

"WHATS WRONG WITH YOU! You were supposed to kill him to fulfill the prophecy of the Kazzjaf! Then as all things come together the Spirits will unite using the ancient weapons of the light and…" the leader started ranting.

But the girl who as it turns out was named Alexia flew at the leader and they started fighting… Roy who was extremely scared ran back upstairs. The vampires tried to follow but ran into the light and exploded instantly.

"I don't want to know what just happened…" Yoshi said and they got to watching TV.

X-Play was on as they reviewed Mario Accountancy and Final Fantasy XXMCXMXXVIMXCMXXMCVI

They decided they would rather watch MTV2... Pimp My Ride was on and they took a hot wheel and added so much stuff to it, it turned INTO a full sized limo… when the owner got back he fainted… then got run over by the guys when they decided they would rather have the car then give it away.

Not watching TV was Fox and Falco… Fox had started drinking after the loss of his dear friend Falco.

"BUT FOX! IM NOT DEAD!" Falco protested watching Fox start hiccupping and crying and vomiting and any other form of mess making in the kitchen.

Just then Yoshi went downstairs to get a soda when he saw DK's dead body.

"AWAWAWAWA!" Yoshi screamed but since no one knew what that meant he waited and then decided to do a normal scream.

Everyone went downstairs and saw the dead body. With Roy's sword still stuck in his eye.

"WHO COULD HAVE DONE SUCH A THING!" Samus yelled shooting her blast into the air in protest… there were no light fixtures down here so she couldn't get hit by one. Suddenly a falling window hit her and she fell over confused.

"THAT'S IT! WE NEED TO ESCAPE NOW!" they yelled and then realized what they had done.

"NOOO!"

"Oh what the hell"

Then Fox fell over with alcohol poisoning and died.

"THE GHOSTS ARE TAKING OVER!" Peach screamed "YOU ALL RUN I'LL HOLD THEM OFF!"

So everyone ran up to the third floor… except Peach who just sat their stupidly… waiting… waiting… bleh.

At the third floor they reached the trap door and were on the roof… looking down at the ground below.

"SCREW THIS I'M JUMPING!" Kirby yelled and jumped… then splattered into the ground below.

Everyone looked around… then went back to the mansion.

Peach decided she would sleep on the roof tonight early (it was now 6:00... I know time passes fast when you have so much fun).

The rest of the Smashers watched TV… except Gannondorf who had found Y. Links Lon Lon Milk…

"THIS MUST BE HOW THAT LITTLE BRAT ALWAYS DEFEATS ME!" Gannondorf yelled and then took a sip. But the Lon Lon Milk turned out to be moldy and old and Gannondorf just screamed and fell over.

When Zelda walked in on the sight she screamed and the 12 remaining Smashers… minus Peach who was on the roof… came running in.

"Oh screw this" they all said sick of running here and there… they just went back to watching TV.

* * *

BLEH!

BLOH!

BLAH!

BLIH!

BLUH!

BLYH!

Ok now for the death list!

MARTH

MR. G&W

LINK

PICHU

BOWSER

Y. LINK

C. FALCON

MEWTWO

NESS

ICE CLIMBERS

DK

FOX

GANNONDORF

Ok R&R… no I'm not in the mood for something funny… you know what… ima shoot you if you don't hurry and review… I'm then gonna call my thug friends over… man I wish I had a thug friend… bye


	7. The Ring!

**The Scary Days!**

**Chapter 7! The Ring!**

Dis: you suck

Claimer: I CALL SHOTGUN!

Disclaimer: I do not own sucking or shotgun… I do not own the ring… I do not own the fact that the TV bill is so high… I do own hair… ugly hair that makes little babies cry.

REVIEWS:

**razzkat**: hey don't cry… people always die in my stories… Fox and Mewtwo are still alive in your SSBM and therefore you can have a hay day… what is a hay day… its that special day you go shovel hay into a cow… ew!

**Fang Palmtree**: yes that is true… but who cares… these peeps are RICH!

GOLD STARS:

Fang Palmtree: you can have 13 cause you gave me a cool idea… ish

razzkat: you can have 6 cause you review me a lot… ish

REEL BIG FISH! PWN YOU! YEA!

THE ALIVE LIST!

FALCO

SAMUS

NESS

ZELDA

MARIO

PEACH

LUIGI

DR. MARIO

PIKACHU

JIGGLYPUFF

YOSHI

* * *

It was 7:00 pm and everyone was watching TV.

Just then the mailman ran through the back door and started chucking mail

"HERES MAIL FOR YOU! AND YOU! AND YOU! AND YOU!"

Peach ran downstairs to get her mail and was hit over the head with a tape… it was labeled 'the ring… for Peach Toadstool… the retard'

Roy had been flooded with fan mail and started screaming as he read some of it.

"Roses are red… Your balls are blue… Come here right now… OR I WILL KILL YOU!" Roy read aloud creped out.

"DIDN'T THEY ALL KILL THEMSELVES IN THAT ANIME FREAK MASS SUICIDE!" he screamed and ran in circles.

"Hey Peach… what's that tape you got?" Samus asked.

"OH! EVERYBODY LISTEN CLOSELY!"

Everyone immediately stopped what they were doing and formed a circle around Peach… the Mailman did a back flip out the window and landed on his neck… this did not kill him however and he drove off…

"OK… long long ago… there was a cabin… at this cabin there was a movie… in this movie there was a ring… all who watched it ended up dead in 7 days… I found this tape… now I am going to watch it to see if the rumors are true!"

Everyone nodded ignorant to the fact she was about to kill everyone in the room.

They sat down on the overly large couch and Peach plopped the tape into the VCR… just then a scream was heard from Samus.

"THIS IS AN OUTRAGE! 5,680 DOLLARS THIS MONTH FOR TV! HOW COULD THEY!" She shot her cannon up in protest and a light fixture landed on her.

The other 10 all watched the screen…

A ring popped up… a ring of fire… then a lighthouse… then a girl doing back flips in front of a mirror… she messed up and landed on her neck… her head fell off and she stumbled around looking for it… then a ladder fell over and landed on the girl… she started screaming… the ring popped up again and suddenly opened showing the girl doing back flips… then it was over.

"Umm what the hell…" Mario said.

Just then the phone started ringing…

Peach walked to it excited and picked it up… it was a bill collector.

"Hello we're here to remind you that a bill of $5,680 is due by next Tuesday… that will be in 6 days"

"Oh… umm ok then…" Peach said sadly and hung up.

"WHAT WAS IT!" Everyone screamed.

"A bill collector…" Peach answered.

"WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!" everyone screamed and ran in circles.

Then another phone call came… Peach looked at it for a while for dramatic effect… the ringing kept up… Peach looked at it longer building up the tension… then the answering machine came on.

"HI THIS IS THE SMASHER MANSION! PLEASE LEAVE A MESSAGE AFTER THE BEEP! AND WE WILL DO OUR BEST TO RETURN YOUR CALL!" Peach shrieked out from the answering machine.

Peach hurried and answered the phone.

"Sorry about that!…"

"SEVEN DAYS!" some creepy voice said on the phone.

"AH THAT'S NO FUN! I COULD FIND AND KILL YOU IN SEVEN DAYS!" Peach said.

"YEA RIGHT!" the voice protested.

"HA! YOU'RE JUST SCARED OF ME AND HOPE SOMETHING ELSE GETS ME IN SEVEN DAYS!"

"SHUT UP! YOU'RE VOICE IS DRIVING ME CRAZY!"

"HA HAH HAHE HEHEHEHE HEE HEE TEE HEE!" Peach was screaming dancing around as everyone looked at her weird.

"OK THAT'S IT! YOU'RE VOICE SCARES ME MORE THAN I SCARE MY VICTEMS! I'M PUTTING AN END TO THIS NOW!" and the phone hung up.

"Sheesh! What was his deal!" Peach said winking.

Suddenly the TV started itself and everything went fuzzy.

"AHH!" everyone screamed…

"NOT AGAIN!"

"OK THAT IS IT!"

"MEH!"

"they were all confused at the fact that they kept saying things all at the same time"

"DAMN!"

Just then a moldy seaweed covered girl started walking at them from the TV.

She came out of the TV and looked at the 11 people who really didn't care…

"WHO'S VOICE WAS THAT ON THE PHONE!"

Peach raised her hand jumping up and down.

"OK I WILL KILL ONLY YOU… I DON'T KNOW HOW THE REST OF YOU CAN PUT UP WITH THIS FREAK!"

Just then Mario stood in front of Peach.

"I CAN NOT ALLOW YOU TO HARM MY PRINCESS!" He cried… literally crying.

The moldy chick started walking towards them… they watched petrified…

They got hungry waiting and went to the kitchen to get something to eat.

They all went back to the TV room and got in their positions.

The moldy chick was about 29 feet away… they got tired and set out some sleeping bags and went to sleep.

The next morning the moldy chick was about 4 feet away… Samus looked around and shot her cannon up in the air defiantly.

"LETS JUST KILL…" a light fixture landed on her.

The moldy chick was making her way towards them… it was 7:35 am… they all went and got some breakfast.

When they made it back to their positions at 8:00 the moldy chick was still 4 feet away… coming closer… coming closer.

Then Samus just aimed her blaster at the moldy chick and shot a missile.

The missile was 9 feet away from the moldy chick… now 8... Now 7...

The moldy chick tried to dodge away… but wasn't fast enough.

4... 3... 2... 1...

"NO! AH! OH CRUD!" were the moldy chicks last words as she was blown to bits.

"YAY!" everyone screamed except for Peach.

Then they all went to watch TV… except Mario who was reading his Harry Potter book.

"YAY FOR THE GRIFFINDOR QUIDICH TEAM! I NEVER EXPECTED THEM TO WIN IN THIS BOOK!"

* * *

YAY!

Oh wait… no deaths? Well yeah because even these Smashers aren't stupid enough to get killed by what is the wimpiest villain of all time…

I'm killing the Death list for the alive list because now less peeps are alive then dead… how sad…

R&LSD… Read and Love Something Dirty

Ok bye now


	8. Weirdo Thingies of Darkness!

**The Scary Days!**

**Chapter 8! Weirdo Thingies of Darkness!**

Disclaimer: Do you really think I would bother with you scum if I owned SSBM! Oh? Really? SHUT UP!

REVIEWS:

Thanks for nothing… I'm not bothering to look at the reviews as I type this but thanks anyway hoes… ok fine I checked and I don't like what I see… IS DEATH ALL YOU THINK ABOUT! Oh… ME TOO! Wow… well sorry, more will die this time.

GOLD STARS:

NO ONE GETS ANY!… ok fine I will take 35 for myself

REEL BIG FISH! PWN YOU! STILL! SO HA!

**THE ALIVE LIST!**

FALCO

SAMUS

NESS

ZELDA

MARIO

PEACH

LUIGI

DR. MARIO

PIKACHU

JIGGLYPUFF

YOSHI

* * *

It was 8:30 am and most peeps were watching early morning cartoons! 

"BUT SONIC! I CANT LET YOU GO!" Amy screamed… she was holding onto his arms as he tried running. Suddenly he used a burst of speed and Amy ended up ripping Sonics arms off.

"OH NO! SONIC?… SONIC! NO!" Amy cried and then killed herself Juliet style.

"Aren't these KIDS cartoons?" Falco asked as Ness started crying.

Zelda walked in the kitchen where Roy was drinking some alcohol.

"Are you even old enough for that?" she asked.

"SH-SHUTUP! I-I CAN DO WH-WHAT I WANT!" Roy said stumbling around.

Just then Zelda lit a match and took a deep breath… why she lit this match… no one knows.

"Roy… I… love you"

Roy who was in the middle of drinking spewed his drink out everywhere causing the match to explode killing Zelda instantly.

"WHAT? Oh crap…"

Roy stumbled out of the room after smashing the bottle of alcohol over his head.

Pikachu walked into the room to get some alcohol and noticed it had been smashed.

"OH NO! SOMEONE HELP! PLEASE! WHY! Oh and Zelda's dead too"

Everyone except Mario ran in to see the dead body… and smashed bottle.

"NO! WHY! WE WANT ALCOHOL! Oh dang how sad Zelda…" everyone said ignoring each other.

Just then Mario ran in smoking and coughing.

"Trouble… coming… run… crap… no… alcohol" Mario said and then died.

A strange garble of words came out as everyone yelled something at the same time… then looked at each other.

"YES!" they all cried.

"CRAP!"

NO!"

"WELL!" Peach said in her ever-creepy voice. "I GUESS WE NEED TO STAY RIGHT HERE AND ACT LIKE NOTHING HAPPENED!"

So it was now 10:00 am and everyone left went off and watched TV!

They tuned it to Spike TV and watched MXC as peeps started trying to jump across stones… then one slipped and landed on one with her neck… she started bouncing across the rocks with her neck and reached the other side limp and lifeless.

"WOW THAT'S OUR MXC IMPACT REPLAY!" and they showed it again laughing their asses off.

They changed the channel to MTV!

They were about to play a song when MTV news came on.

"EMENEM! HE SANG A SONG SAYING HE DOESN'T LIKE BUSH! THAT'S ONE VOTE FOR KARRY FROM MICHIGAN!"

"Hasn't election day been over for like 8 months or something?" Ness asked.

Everyone decided they didn't care and switched the channel.

They went to Comedy Central where Blue Collar TV was on.

"RED NECK! OOH! AHH! REDNECKIAN!" Jeff Foxworthy said and everyone laughed hysterically.

They immediately switched to Cartoon Network where DBZ was playing.

"You attacked me when I was young… but you didn't know I would one day come back to get you for it… I trained every blah blah so now blah blah blah kazzjaf blah blah I found 2 dragon balls then and went to attack blah blah blah and so now you think you can defeat me when blah blah blah prepare to die because you are no match for me blah blah blah blah" some weird blobby dude said and grinned then the episode was over.

"WOW! SO ACTION PACKED!" Yoshi yelled.

They then tuned to Nick and watched Spongebob start laughing and running around Squidward so Squidward pulled a gun and killed him.

"HAHAHA YOU LITTLE PRICK WHAT NOW!" he yelled and hid Spongebob's dead body in the closet.

Just then some weird dark things broke down the door.

"KAZZJAF!" they screamed and charged.

Falco shot at them but his blaster was at its lowest power and he had to charge it up while wondering why he had even put it at a low setting…

Dr. Mario threw a pill at one making it bigger… so Dr. Mario threw another pill and the dark guy was even bigger…

Samus shot up at the giant Dark thing but missed and caused a giant light fixture to land on her.

Everyone was fighting now… but it was no hope… there were just too many people… Yoshi then decided to eat them all and made like one hundred eggs… which everyone ate for lunch.

"Wow that ended fast" Ness commented.

But no one loves Ness at the SSBM mansion so no one bothered to respond.

It was now 12:30 pm (I know time just flies right by in this place). They decided they would watch some TV.

They watched HSN…

"HI! WE'RE SELLING YOU THIS LOVELY DEAD RAT!" this weird looking girl said smiling so brightly that the glare got in her companions eyes and he was blinded.

"AH IT BURNS! OW! GET IT OUT! AH!" he screamed and went running around the set before crashing into a camera… little fires started everywhere and flaming people started running around, skin melting off of the body.

"We are closed for technical difficulty… sorry" the screen said… black.

Peach then went upstairs and saw Marth once again posing dramatically… she sat there building up dramatic tension.

"Hello?" Peach said. "What is the deeper meaning?"

Marth then turned his head fliping his hair around dramatically… he faced her slowly.

"Kazzjaf…" he began.

"Yea?" Peach said excitedly.

Marth sat there with a sad look in his eyes.

Peach stared at Marth…

They sat like this until he disappeared.

Peach then forgot what happened and then accidentally opened all of Dr. Mario's freezer things.

Every victim had been stuck in these freezers and preserved but were now visible to Peach… it all came together now… everything fit… she had to go confront him one on one… she knew what Kazzjaf meant… and Dr. Mario was the key…

She ran down the stairs when she tripped and went rolling down the stairs screaming.

Dr. Mario went to help her when she slapped his hands out of her way and pointed at him looking terrified.

"YOU ARE THE KAZZJAF!" she yelled.

* * *

DUN DUN DUN! 

Is it a plot!… no… oh well…

Who died this chappy?

Zelda…

Mario…

Oh wow…

Well that makes up for last chapters lack of death right?

Oh well… at least you liked it… WHAT?

Oh well…

R&R… what cant I do it right for once… oh? Oh fine! R&L READ AND LOOSE!

HAHAHA!

See if I even care…

Oh and in case you care... (and i know you do) i am holding SSBM ADVERTISEMENTS for like... 1 day most likely... cause i want to go to bed now... and so you dont get your fun update... how sad...


	9. Snore Reduction!

**The Scary Days!**

**Chapter 9! Snore Reduction!**

Disclaimer: I don't own any of this stuff… the really sad part is I don't even own China… oh wait…

REVIEWS:

Ummm ya… you like Kazzjaf…. SO DO I!… oh and don't worry I am immune to sledge… so a sledge hammer will not work… so that's fine…

GOLD STARS:

RAZZKAT GETS 12 CAUSE HE LIKES KAZZJAF!

Reel Big Fish, Ska Punk, We're Not Happy 'Till You're Not Happy, PWNAGE

**THE ALIVE LIST!**

FALCO

SAMUS

NESS

PEACH

LUIGI

DR. MARIO

PIKACHU

JIGGLYPUFF

YOSHI

ROY

* * *

It was 1:00 pm in the Smasher mansion… and Peach was confronting Dr. Mario at the bottom of the stairs into the lab.

"YOU ARE THE KAZZJAF!" Peach screamed.

"Peach… Kazzjaf is a kind of snore reduction pill!" Dr. Mario yelled.

"YOU ARE THE SNORE REDUCER!" Peach screamed.

"Peach I think you need to get some rest… now" Dr. Mario yelled.

All this crazy noise caused everyone to run up and see what was happening… Samus immediately shot her cannon into the air to shut everyone up.

"LOOK WE ALL JUST NEED TO…" a light fixture landed on her.

Peach pointed at Samus.

"SHE HAS BEEN CURSED BY THE KAZZJAF!"

Dr. Mario chained Peach into her room… then everyone went downstairs to watch TV… Ness made a quick stop in his room.

They watched Case Closed… but ever since the main characters had died in the mansion it was nothing but random screen shots in an anime city… VERY boring.

Then Ness came walking in with red white and blue clothes everywhere… Uncle Sam hat… Flag cape… and he was waving a little plastic American flag…

"Ness what are you wearing!" Roy yelled.

"I AM ALL AMERICAN!" Ness yelled waiving his plastic flag everywhere.

Dr. Mario took a look at the flag… it read "made in China" He just looked at Ness.

"Yes you sure are All-American…"

"WHAT IS THIS 'AMERICA' I HEAR OF!" Roy yelled.

"You LIVE in America… we are in America right now…" Dr. Mario said.

"STOP BEING SUCH A SMARTY PANTS 'DOCTOR!'" Ness yelled.

"YEA!" everyone said at once… then just started screaming.

Roy went into the kitchen to get something to eat… as he ate some cold pizza Yoshi came walking in.

"Hey can I have some?" Yoshi asked.

"NO! ITS ALL MINE!" Roy yelled and cuddled with the pizza.

"GIVE ME PIZZA!" Yoshi screamed and launched his tongue out at Roy… but he missed and split his tongue on Roy's sword.

"AWAWAWAWA" Yoshi screamed before dieing… no one knows what that means though so no one came running.

Roy looked around scared and ran up to his room pretending to write a story named The Scary Days.

It was 3:00 pm when Jigglypuff walked in and saw the dead Yoshi laying on the floor…

"ARG!" Jigglypuff screamed… but everyone just though she was playing pirates so they ignored her.

"THERE IS A DEAD BODY IN THIS ROOM!" Jigglypuff screamed but everyone thought she was playing detective so no one came running.

"I THINK SSBM IS A BORING GAME!" Jigglypuff yelled feeling desperate.

Everyone came charging in with their might…

"HOW DARE YOU!" they all screamed and ignoring the dead body… popped Jigglypuff and went back to watch TV.

As they sat there Dr. Mario turned to Ness in his All-American glory.

"Why are you being so patriotic… YOU'RE MADE IN JAPAN!"

"Oh so just because I wasn't born here you think that gives you the right to racially profile! YOU RACIST SCUM! YOU MAKE THIS GREAT COUNTRY OF OURS WEAK!" Ness yelled as he stood up looking at nothing being dramatic.

"I'm Japanese too ya know" Dr. Mario said.

"NO YOU! ARE ITALIAN! AND YOU THINK THAT MAKES YOU BETTER THAN ME!"

Dr. Mario just gave up on Ness and turned back to TV.

They watched Weakest Link.

"AND TAMIYAMIHOMESTAR IS THE WEAKEST LINK!" the host yells.

"BUT WE HAVEN'T EVEN VOTED YET!" He screamed before getting launched off.

Roy came walking down with a fake grin on his face.

"WHAT DID I MISS!"

"Oh Jigglypuff said SSBM wasn't a fun game so we killed her… nothing else" Everyone said together.

Roy ran into the kitchen and spat on Jigglypuff's dead body then ran.

They turned the channel to the Andy Milinokis show… he started running in circles in the street fake screaming when someone from an apartment threw his knifes at Andy slicing him up… then all the people on the street saw his dead body.

"FOOD!" they yelled and dove onto the dead kid.

They turned to Adult swim where Inuyasha was on.

"INUYASHA YOU LET ME HOME! INUYASHA SIT! MWAHAHAHA YOU GOT SITTED! OH AND AGAIN! INUYASHA IM GOING TO GO TAKE A BATH REAL CLOSE FOR NO REASON YOU CANT COME WITHIN 500 FEET! SIT! HAHA! BLEH!…" Kagome was screaming her head off.

"WILL YOU SHUTUP WENCH!" Inuyasha screamed pushing her away after she sat him for the hundredth time.

"YOU JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND ME WHY MUST YOU BE SO HEARTLESS YOU DOLT! ARG!" Kagome screamed and it turned out she had rabies.

Then the credits started rolling and everyone was looking into the distance dramatically.

"TIME FOR BED!" Peach screamed from upstairs.

"YES MOM!" everyone yelled… even though it was 5:00 pm… and we still don't know how Adult swim was on by then… maybe cause the ratings on their daytime shows dropped due to being… less… good… SUCKING!

So everyone went upstairs and followed Peaches orders even though she was chained to her bed in her room… and she never ordered them to unchain her…

Everyone went to bed… then they woke up… then it was 12:00 am so they went to bed… then they woke up…

It was 6:00 am and NickNite was still on… and they were all wearing what they wore yesterday…

They never watched NickNite but they still knew it was still on at six in the morning.

Samus and Falco were kissing not-so-passionately… because Peach ordered them to right in front of her… then Samus got I strange idea… _why in the hell am I kissing Falco in front of Peach… oh yea cause I want to…_

Then Falco got a strange idea… _why in the hell am I kissing Samus in front of Peach…_ so Falco broke the kiss and left… leaving a not caring Peach and a Caring Samus… then Samus tried to shoot herself but ended up shooting a light fixture and knocking herself out…

"THERES BEEN ANOTHER MURDER!" Peach screamed and everyone went rushing into her room.

"SAMUS HAS BEEN MURDERED!" Peach cried and Ness walked up to her breathing body.

"Actually she's still perfectly fine…" Ness said when Roy tripped lodging his sword into the dead Samus… then ran before anyone even noticed what happened.

"Oh never mind she died" Ness said and went back to the rather small crowd.

Luigi then jumped up and rose his hand valiantly…

"WE ARE THE LAST! THE LAST OF THREE!" Luigi screamed.

"Where'd you get that from?" Pikachu asked.

"Dunno it just came to me…"

So then everyone went back to sleep even though its now like 7:00 am…

Ness decided some snore reducer wouldn't hurt and so he took some Kazzjaf from Dr. Mario and ate a pill… then coughed up blood and died.

"DAMNIT DON'T YOU READ THE COMMERCIALS!" Dr. Mario screamed. "ITS NOT INTENDED FOR KIDS UNDER 16 WHO WEIGH LESS THAN 200 POUNDS!"

The scream woke everyone up and they all decided they needed to leave the mansion before any more deaths could occur… then they realized that Ness had died earlier in the story and wondered how the crud he could have come back like that… then just shrugged and left.

---------------------------------------

He walked up to a curtain… a voice came from behind…

"THE KAZZJAF IS COMPLETE! SOON NESS AND ALL THE OTHERS WILL REINCARNATE AS ZOMBIES! AND NOTHING WILL STOP MY PLAN!"

"Yes master" he said and left limping… then just fell over and popped… then the voice behind the curtain coughed and all was black… then Dr. Mario turned off the TV and decided they might as well start on the escape attempt.

* * *

WOW NESS DIED TWICE!

SO DID YOSHI! (ha ha)

AND JIGGLYPUFF!

AND SAMUS!

And I am really disappointed you guys didn't pick up on Ness being brought back to life… maybe I don't even care! Ooh!

Only 6 remain…

FALCO

LUIGI

DR. MARIO

PEACH

PIKACHU

ROY

R&LMAO… Read and Lose My Awesome Ocarina…


	10. Escape!

**The Scary Days!**

**Chapter 10! Escape!**

Disclaimer: I don't own the sweet feel of freedom… or sweet potato pie… or sweet little baby girls… but I have eaten all three…

REVIEWS:

Read mine for some fun… stuff…

**ANIME FREAK!**: O.o since when did anime freaks like my stuff… seeing as how I killed like 300,000 of you guys… OH WELL!… I'm going to sell out completely to the conformism of non-conformists and say ok whatever… (oh that's fine do what ya want… glad ya like it!)... shut up...I like Gorillaz too! but i happen to hate most of anime... no clue why, I just do OH but Case Closed is awsome!

GOLD STARS:

YOU CAN ALL HAVE 24! CAUSE I AM 25 AND 25 IS PERFECTION!

REEL BIG… oh crap I forgot… I'm listening to them right now either way…

**THE ALIVE LIST!**

FALCO

PEACH

LUIGI

DR. MARIO

PIKACHU

ROY

* * *

"OK EVERYONE! THIS WILL BE A VERY DANGEROUS TASK! AND MANY OF US MAY DIE! SO I WILL BE NOBLE AND TAKE POINT!" Peach yelled as the other 5 nodded. 

They set off for the back door… they made it into the kitchen… then to the back room… they were right there… everything was in slow-mo…

"NOO!" Luigi screamed and dove in front of Dr. Mario… then crashed into the wall and cracked his neck.

"WHY!" Dr. Mario screamed looking into the air dramatically.

Then Pikachu tripped in slow-mo and crashed into the floor.

"GO ON WITHOUT ME!" He screamed.

"I CANT LET THESE PEOPLE DIE!" Peach cried and ran to the 3 guys.

Roy and Falco dove for the door but they crashed into it at the same time… and got stuck.

"ARG! HELP US!" Falco screamed.

Roy looked around desperate… then sliced Falco in half and slid through the door.

"NO! WHY! THEY GOT FALCO!" Roy screamed and the scene spun around in the air dramatically.

"OK! WE MADE IT! AND ONLY 2 OF US DIED!" Dr. Mario said throwing a pill into the air and trying to catch it. He ended up slapping it at Pikachu… it landed in Pikachu's mouth and caused him to choke to death.

"MAKE THAT 3!"

"Umm now what…" Roy asked.

"ONE OF US MUST BE THE KAZZJAF!" Peach screamed.

"FOR THE LAST TIME KAZZJAF IS A SNORE REDUCER!" Dr. Mario screamed.

So they got bored and went back into the mansion… THEY WATCHED TV!

Everywhere they went it was another advertisement… they tried every channel! They finally got to watch South Park… but the minute Cartman said "SHIT!" the advertisements started.

"NO!" they all screamed and cried and then realized they were supposed to escape the mansion.

"Well… we cant use the SSB SUV cause DK crashed it… the phone got knocked out in that weird person rain… WHAT WILL WE EVER DO!" Peach screamed.

"Well… the deliveryman left his van here…" Roy said.

"LETS GO!" Dr. Mario shouted and jumped out the window… so the others followed and they made it to the van.

"CAN I TAKE ONE LAST SHOWER BEFORE WE LEAVE!" Peach asked… "ALONE!"

"Oh whatever… FINE!" Dr. Mario said and they waited by the van… and they waited… and they waited…

"You know what… screw her lets go…" Roy said.

"YOU MUST BE THE KILLER!" Dr. Mario yelled and pointed at Roy.

"Why… its not like you like her or anything…"

"Well yea… BUT YOU KILLED MARIO AND LUIGI!"

"Umm actually I didn't kill them… I didn't kill anyone… I'm just saying we might want to leave before ALL of us die…" Roy said sounding nervous.

"I CANT LET YOU GET AWAY WITH THIS!" Dr. Mario screamed and threw a pill at Roy… it just bounced off his head.

"DUDE! THAT F-ING HURT! WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM! OW!" Roy yelled holding his head which now had a strange red mark on it.

"Ya know… Being hurt is like being drunk… it shows who you REALLY are!" Dr. Mario screamed… Roy just stopped what he was doing and started laughing his head off.

"HAHAHA! DUDE! BEING DRUNK BRINGS OUT PART OF YOU THAT ISNT YOU! YOU'RE A DOCTOR! WHATS YOUR PROBLEM MORON!" Roy laughed and started rolling on the ground.

Dr. Mario realized what he had said and just shrugged then threw more pills at Roy.

"OW! OW! OW! STOP IT ALREADY! ARG! OK THAT'S IT!" Roy yelled and sliced Dr. Mario's head off…

Just then Peach walked out and saw what had happened.

"NO!" she screamed giving herself away even though Roy hadn't even seen her… at all… the whole story… which doesn't make since… oh well…

Then Peach ran into the Mansion even though she could have gotten to the van faster…

Roy just shrugged and drove away… but then a semi-truck rammed him head on and a huge explosion killed everyone in it completely.

"I… I am the last of the three…" Peach said looking on in horror… she couldn't bear to leave the house and just sat there watching TV…

Next Tuesday came along and they hadn't paid the TV bill… so the TV that Peach had sat in front of for days strait turned off… then Peach screamed and killed herself… leaving the once stupid chaotic mansion… to a stupid silent mansion… it became abandoned… then the Sprits of the Kazzjaf haunted it… then the ancient weapons of Light were stolen from the pawn shop and hidden in the basement… inside of the vampire chicks coffin… then the dark figures took the place over… but Marth had seen this coming… and set a bomb to go off 20 days after his death… so everything blew up…

Then a Wal-Mart was built on the rubble… and a staff of 12 people tried to keep the store running… they had crappy service and overly expensive everything but everyone went there anyways… even though it was in the middle of nowhere it had at least 500 people in it at the least busy days…

But then the Spirits of the Kazzjaf took over the Wal-Mart and made everything cheap and efficient… because no one ever goes to those kinds of places the Wal-Mart was destroyed… Then all that was left was 25 dead freaks sitting at what used to be a couch… watching what used to be a TV… screaming what used to be English… here is what they were watching… on HBO…

"THE RING 2!… yes you all hated the first one… but for some moronic reason you all loved NUMBER 2! EVEN THOUGH NUMBER 2 HAS ALWAYS BEEN THE WORSE ONE!"

The Smashers all realized what they were doing and switched it to MXC! Cause that show pwns… but they didn't have a recorder thing so there were long tracks of time when nothing was on and they nearly died… then one day their souls did die… and there was nothing but spirit bones…

THE END!

* * *

WOW! 

Well that ended before I thought it would… not really… SHUT UP!

Hmm what could I possibly say… how disappointed you guys must be now that this is over… I suggest you get lives and get over it…

READ! AND! Well I don't care anymore… you know what… Review and I will tell you that you get wonder gold stars… na I think I wont… I SHALL HOG ALL THE STARS FOR MYSELF!

Whatever… cry for me… I need to start a new STORY kind of story… what should I do?… hmm… oh well you shall hear of me soon…

Whatever... I need to go play SUPER MARIO 64! Cause it's the best game ever!… I've been playing all my old school N64 games and I LOVE them… it just seems like all the new games have lost their fun… well… actually SSBM pwns SSB… in like every way… but most N64 stuff beats their GCN counterparts… well… not really… BUT THEY ARE STILL FUN!

And I will stop trying to add words to the document and say good bye.


End file.
